invincible

There is something weird going on in my head right now. It is blind optimism. I don’t know if it’s because I feel like what happened last month officially put me at rock bottom, or what but I have this very intense certainty that our bad luck ended with that surgery-gone-wrong. I had to schedule a follow up SHG three weeks after the surgery to see if there was any tissue still in my uterus. In my head I was prepared that most likely there would be and I would need another hysteroscopy. I mean it only made sense…what are the chances that the surgeon punctured the hole in my uterus while she was getting the last bit of tissue out? But my gut told me something different. My gut told me everything would be clear. My gut was right.

Now don’t get me wrong, this wasn’t without a bit of drama and a fair amount of pain. The actual procedure for the SHG had to be done twice because the first catheter was faulty. So that was not fun. Then the doctor saw a small piece of tissue and he was fairly certain it was a piece of my lining, but to be sure he poked at it and squirted saline until it broke off. Let’s just say my uterus was not happy yesterday. My husband even looked like he was gonna pass out while they were doing this…which has never happened to him before.

Anyways, so I got to go in for my baseline today and if things go as planned will likely have the transfer around the 21st. We are planning to take a vacation somewhere tropical and warm the following week so hopefully the dreaded wait is a breeze. But this brings me back to the title of this post. I feel certain this transfer will work. Like so certain that I will be SHOCKED if it doesn’t. I have never experienced such optimism with a transfer before…not even with my first one. Let’s just hope my gut is right…

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